Hello fellow sci-fi and horror movie lovers!
Behold! A blog about all that there is to learn from these wonderfully strange, pedagogical tools. Written by a girl who grew up watching Stargate, Doctor Who, and countless other nerdy shows with her parents….Don’t judge.
Each week, I will be watching a movie and listing the five most important life lessons I have gleaned from it. This week, I decided to watch Serenity, Joss Whedon’s underrated cinematic adaptation of his equally underrated series Firefly. If any of the life lessons are at all confusing, I recommend using the all-mighty powers of Google and Wikipedia to unlock the secrets of Joss Whedon’s mind. AKA read about the show and its cinematic counterpart. But, now, it is time for the list to begin….
Life Lessons from Serenity:
1. Always bring grenades.
Just in case a group of cannibalistic Reavers (think zombies meet rabies-infested monkeys) decides to follow you, hover-craft style, and then harpoon you in the leg.
2. Monkey Bars should be an integral part of your workout routine.
Because you never know when you will have to use your superhuman, monkey-bar crossing abilities to traverse a space compound’s massive, silo-like computer-room, complete with giant rotating fans. Story of my life.
3. Never fall in love with a woman who sells herself.
And, no, not in that Moulin Rouge kind of a way. Your concern with space hookers is not contracting STDs, but rather that an assassin might use her as bait in order to capture the psychic you are hiding on board your ship. Come on, I know you are hiding a psychic right now.
4. Embed subliminal messages within dancing octopi.
That way, when you play the video all over the galaxy to activate a fugitive psychic’s sociopathic tendencies, no one will question you! Because, seriously, who doesn’t love a dancing octopus?
And finally…..get ready for the most important life lesson yet….
5. When faced with insurmountable odds, bring a cannibalistic army with you.
It’s just a good war strategy.
So, there you have it. The life lessons of Serenity. If you liked what you read, be sure to check back next week when I will be analyzing……another movie. The exact title is still being debated….Feel free to leave any suggestions!